Gratitude

As I was preparing for my CT scan last week, the tech asked me when I was supposed to start my treatment (he had obviously read my file). I told him I didn't have to start treatment cause they were able to get all the cancer with surgery. He looked at me and said, "No wonder you are so happy."

YES!! I am happy! I have so many things to be thankful for! I can't believe it has been a year since my surgeries. My one year checkup went very well. My CT and my labs all came back clean. I still have a large cyst in my abdomen, but Dr. Purcell has high hopes it will go away on its own. He is not worried about it and will continue to watch it, and I don't have to go back for a year instead of in 6 months!! What a wonderful day it was!!

I am so thankful to have found myself in the hands of such a wonderful surgeon and also a wonderful oncologist in Billings. I am so thankful to for the priesthood and the power to heal if it is the Lord's will. I am thankful for its for to provide comfort and guidance. I am thankful to know that my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ know me personally. I have been taught so many things about myself in the last year. I have learned I can't do it on my own. I know the Lord sends His help through others. I learned that He cares about even the little things that are big to us - like NG tubes, cold sores, drains, lack of energy. I have learned that it is ok if the house is not clean all the time, if a gourmet meal is not on the table every night, the girls' hair does not have to be perfect 24/7, it's ok to say no, and it's okay to spend time each day doing something for just me. I have learned that children are very resilient; they seem to sense just when you need a hug and a kiss; they will step up when there is no other option; they love to help out and can do more than I give them credit for. It is fun to work a little and play a lot with my kids - to stop and enjoy the little moments each day with them.

I am thankful to be able to workout again. I am thankful to be able to do the laundry for my family. I am thankful to be able to run my kids to their various activities and appointments. I am thankful to be able to fix meals for my family (I still don't enjoy cooking but I like that I can be the one not enjoying it!). I am thankful to be able to snuggle with the love of my life and not worry about tubes or sore scars. I am thankful to be able to jump on the trampoline, to push my kids on the swings, to shoot hoops, to play volleyball.

I can't believe how things have changed in a year. I have been blessed with a wonderful support system. I have a wonderful, amazing husband, 5 beautiful children, an awesome family, and the best friends a girl could ask for. There are still parts of me that need to continue to heal but what healing is left is so minimal compared to where I was year ago. I am so very blessed!!